As you know by now, the barren women of the bible are some of my most prominent mentors in learning how I am to lead a life with empty arms. I’ve spoken of Hannah before and today I want to begin walking with you through Abraham & Sarah’s journey.
They are a prominent couple in scripture with a powerful testimony of faith, as well as lack of faith. They definitely had their ups and downs throughout their marriage and most notable of them all was Abraham’s affair with Hagar… that, get this, was arranged by Sarah herself! What was that woman thinking!?! While barren women of today likely wouldn’t throw their husband to a mistress for the sake of obtaining a child, we can most assuredly identify with her desperation to have them.
However, despite this “little” hiccup in their infertility journey, at the end of the day, they are most recognized as being inducted into the Hall of Faith. Surrounding the devastating affair, that forever changed the course of history, these two were found to possess the kind of faith that can move mountains. They were patient, humble, showed genuine love for the Lord, and exercised their faith and hope in Him.
Isn’t it amazing that even though we falter, sometimes in even the most unthinkable ways, we are still used and loved by God? That just because others or we ourselves see us as despicable and unworthy we are still blameless as believers in the eyes of our Lord? Simply amazing. There’s nothing that we do that can’t be forgiven. No assault is found to be too unclean for the Blood of Christ to wash white as snow. Always remember that!
Back to the awesome couple of the hour.
The triumph over infertility that these two experienced was a true demonstration of their love for one another. As infertile couples know, this kind of trial can break a marriage. And yet, for as long as they walked that path, the love for one another didn’t waver.
Sarah wanted so desperately to be the woman who would carry an heir for Abraham. She followed him all the days of her life through moves away from family, ministry, the affair (again that they both had part in), the result of that affair in Ishmael and the pain, healing from the affair, issues with her father in law, and tumultuous times in their culture (think Sodom & Gomorrah and the growth of pagan practices).
Abraham was the same way. He had his flaws but ultimately he protected his wife, loved her, provided for her, and had compassion for their struggle.
Infertility can lead to wavering faith and doubt through frustration, heart-brokenness, impatience, grief, countless negative pregnancy tests (or in Sarah’s case countless visits from Aunt Flo), loss of hope, temptations to take your frustrations out on one another, the list goes on. They had a full life with lots of opportunity to give up but they didn’t.
Sarah had a unique perspective that I think a lot of us women share. We tend to feel the need to carry the infertility burden for our husbands. We some how feel like we are the major players in the game. As John MacArthur wrote in Twelve Extraordinary Women: “As long as she [Sarah] remained childless, the sense that everything somehow hinged on her must have pressed on her like a great burden on her shoulders. Despite her faith, she knew from a human perspective that her long years of childlessness already loomed large as a threat to the fulfillment of God’s pledge. Sarah must have constantly pondered these things, and as time went by, the weight of her burden only increased.”
I can say first hand, the burden is real. Countless times I’ve wept and prayed about Brooks having an heir. As a man’s deepest desire is to provide for his family, a woman longs to afford him the family for which to do so. We personally have discussed the reality that we are building this life and yet no one to leave our legacy to. Another question on our minds, who in the world is going to take care of us when we’re old and need our senior diapers changed!?!?
You know me… I’ve got to add in a little humor… ?
Abraham and Sarah lived the struggle that we still face today. In some ways, it comforts me to know that, even though we don’t live in the same era and generation, we can relate to this couple. Their marriage wasn’t perfect nor their walk with the Lord. They personally had imperfections and took the wrong path at times. But, their’s is a walk that led to a happy, fruitful, and faith proving ending and I am so happy and encouraged to have them as an example.
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