Dreams of a Baby Girl

I want a baby girl. I admit it! I know the right and expected thing to say is “as long as it’s healthy” but who are we kidding!?!? Give me a baby girl! Before you start thinking those judgmental thoughts, just hear me out. Of course I would be thrilled with a son! But it’s a little girl that has always shown up in my dreams. It’s the connection between a mother & her daughter that I always long for. If the Lord surprises me with a son, I will be ecstatic. The image of my husband and his son working side by side, brings me to tears. To hear him call my beloved hubby ‘daddy’.. oh my lanta… whew! I get goosebumps just thinking about it. I long for this too. But let’s face it… this blog post is titled “Dreams of a Baby GIRL”. I’ll save the boy dreaming for another post… once we figure out a name. 😉

As little girls dream about their one day wedding and all of the glorious details, I dream up baby names and the beautiful, wonderful relationship that I will have with her.  My soul thirsts for the day that I will hold her for the first time, look into her eyes, take her to activities she’s involved in, cook with her, color with her, pray with her, help her plan her wedding, do ministry with her, talk her through dating, marriage, parenting, and that glorious day when she one day says “Momma(!) I’m pregnant!!!! EEE!!!!”… {sigh} my first grand baby. That is what I daydream about.

Over the years, I’ve rummaged through numerous names; recording each one in the notes app on my phone or in my journal. But I have to say one rings truer than true for me. This name has a meaning and a history that spans far beyond 10 years to when I was a little girl myself.

ALLISON ELIZABETH

I’ve always wanted to change my name to Elizabeth. I don’t know what it is about that name but somehow I knew in my heart that I was an ‘Elizabeth’. I begged and begged my parents to let me change it. One day they finally gave me permission and offered to help me do it. My guess is that they knew I wouldn’t go through with it and that’s why they offered… Just a guess. Of course they were right and I didn’t. I chickened out at the last minute. Since I wasn’t going to change my name, I decided that’s what I would name my baby girl. I’ve held onto this for so long and have always known in my heart I would be using it one day.

In the summer of 2013, Brooks and I were led to do ministry in Nicaragua. There were so many beautiful children there and they were so happy! All of them had smiles and were so full of joy. It was contagious and I loved it! One little girl in particular caught my husband’s eye. I’ve never seen him react to a child with such intensity & attention as this one. Of course he loves children but she was different. There was something about her. I’ve only seen such a depth of love in his eyes with one other child – his nephew.

Her name was ALLISON. She was a very beautiful, high energy, spirited little girl. To Allison, there was something about Brooks, too. As he went about his construction work on the pharmacy, she would sit and watch him; staring. Throughout our visits, she would congregate around him, sit in his lap.

We went back a year later in 2014 and found Allison in her village, Chinandega. She had grown so much but was running a fever and very sick. We don’t know her condition at this point. We only pray that her condition has bettered and she is fully recovered. She will always hold a special place in our heart. I think we can say that we truly LOVE this little girl who has somehow stolen our hearts.

So with all that said, we’ve picked our name for a girl. I love this name because it honors the little girl in me and our little girl in Nicaragua. I can’t wait for the day that I get to use it. I can only imagine how lovely that will be.